Does She Like Me?

Reader matter:

i have already been friends with this specific woman for some time. She broke up with the woman sweetheart. We have been texting much – like 200 communications per week. We keep getting mixed indicators from the girl, and I really like this lady. Must I do it now? But Really don’t should ruin the relationship sometimes. We in addition hang out, and that I believe she looks for me for the halls.

-Ivan S. Bently (Kansas)

Expert’s Answer:

Hi, Ivan. Thanks for trusting united states with this specific crucial individual issue.

There are a great number of options to describe what’s happening here, but let me provide you with my personal “take.” First and foremost, you say she actually is giving combined indicators, which most likely means she’s perplexed and not certain of precisely what she desires.

She could have ideas or expectations for your commitment she just left, or she could be waiting for you which will make a step. She might still maintain the healing up process, and she might not be willing to be observed openly with another guy but.

Texting is her way of speaking out and connecting nowadays while she finishes emotionally disconnecting from the woman ex. She may also be confused if the woman friendship for your needs sometimes looks wants it is growing into something bigger, but she is unclear if you “like” like the girl.

As for you, Ivan, you are in a really precarious place today. She is regarding the rebound and requires mental service. She trusts both you and feels better when she offers some texts or hangs completely along with you. She actively seeks you in places because she likes you, in one single means or other, that is certainly where you need to be careful. Should you place the friendship initially above the interest in dating her as a girlfriend, you’re in significant danger of becoming relegated into the “friend region,” and is a hard location to getting away from.

My advice to you personally is to find including this lady and chat in person. It should be early in the day and smaller than a real big date, it will give you a concept if she wants to view you or perhaps not. Tell the girl she must get-out and take an hour or so to chuckle appreciate herself and also you would really love the chance to consult with her in a tad bit more level, as well. Pick an area where your buddies never ever get – perhaps a Starbucks anywhere – so she’s going to feel as if the woman confidentiality is being shielded.

Ask her how she is performing assuming she is genuinely done along with her ex. Spend extremely close attention to the woman body gestures. Is she bending towards you or out? Is actually she big-eyed and cheerful, or detached and considerate? Is she performing “girly” or like a buddy?

Absolutely something else you must do: inform her in a very matter-of-fact way that you prefer their. Then don’t state another term. This lady has are the next someone to speak. Take a look this lady squarely when you look at the vision so she will visit your power and your sincerity. Boldly and confidently understand the woman neck or fingers. Just be sure she understands you are considering her in a romantic man-woman style of way.

End up being strong and type but never psychological or desperate. Make their need come to you the caring and comfortable man you may be rather than for great child who is “safe” and benign. Her real thoughts and objectives should expose themselves while the conversation unfolds.

Do it now,

Nick

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